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Biting back

Fulltime Foster Carer - Harriet author of: A Less Ordinary Family

Biting back

Thursday’s Foster Care Blog

After a few quiet days at home not feeling 100 per cent, I need to return to the organising of Christmas.  Mum’s don’t really get “time-off” and I am no different.  Charlie has to work this week and, being a vicar, doesn’t finish until Christmas day. So I need to get on with the last minute preparations, like last minute wrapping of presents, posting all the Christmas parcels to friends and family, food shopping and generally keeping the house in order and preventing World War 3 taking place between the children.  Although Charlie works from home a lot, I can’t rely on him to keep coming out of his office to separate the children during the school holidays!

I don’t know what it is about this Christmas holidays but Alice seems to have turned into a gremlin.  She seems to be on hyper-alert – looking for an argument wherever she can find one.  She is armed and ready with a look or nasty comment. She has been targeting Lauren this week.  Every little thing she says, every slip of the tongue, Alice jumps in with a biting comment which pretty much always ends up with Lauren biting back.  Not only that, everything we ask her to do has become way too difficult – from getting dressed to brushing her teeth.  Unless we stand over her nagging then it simply doesn’t get done.  I have had to leave the room on more than one occasion so that I do not lose my temper!

Today we have some friends coming to join us for brunch.  It is a nice break in an otherwise hectic week.  Our friends daughter has Downs Syndrome.  Between her and Alice competing to be the most ‘special’, it usually makes for an ‘interesting’ time.  Today proves to be no different.  Attention is moved away from Lauren and onto our friends daughter.  She is someone who can do no right in Alice’s eyes.  We have to step in on several occasions to remind Alice she needs to share her toys.  Lauren has made the most of the opportunity for a break and has scurried away to her bedroom.  This is unusual for her as she is an extrovert and loves being with people all the time, so she really must have had enough. We leave her to it.

There is a sense that the end of the holidays cannot come soon enough, and we find the time that Alice has at school to be some respite for us in the house on occasions!  Sometimes we feel guilty about acknowledging that, but it is important to note that we need to good team around us supporting us, and sometimes that team involves school!  We are hoping that we can get through the Christmas holidays without too much drama!

A Less Ordinary Family Fostering Blog

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