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Fostering Blog | Ups and downs

Tuesday’s Fostering Blog

Alice has been back from our friends for two days and it is like she has never been away. My friend noted how different her behaviour is with us than it was when she stayed with her. She was pretty shocked at what she saw and what she heard her say. She reported that for two days she had been an angelic child eating all her meals which included a variety of vegetables and fruit and anything else she was asked. To be honest I am not surprised, I have seen the difference between how she is with different teaching assistants at school with what she will and will not eat.

We have seen her manipulative behaviour increase in intensity over many months. We will continue to work hard to not take it personally at least not to show her that we do. You can’t help but feel like it is personal but you have to trust the advice given by those experts who have done so much research on children with attachment issues. It is hard to separate your brain from your heart. There have been many “lunge time” moments over the last two days I feel like my thighs are getting really toned – so at least one good thing can come out of this.

Alice has gone to the beach for the day with the local disability charity who organise day trips in the holidays for children with additional needs this has become a lifeline to our family and whilst it is an expensive day out we are more than happy to use the disability living allowance personal care element to pay for what has become an essential part of respite. We are so grateful to all of the staff who work so tirelessly for so many long hours to look after such complex children. They put on activities which really go the extra mile to give the children lovely memories as well as giving parents a much needed break. We know that when she comes back we will have to deal again with the ups and downs, but for today we will enjoy the break!

A Less Ordinary Family Foster Care Blog