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Foster Carers Blog Diary

Fostering Blog – Rehab.

Had a call from Paige’s Dad today saying that they intended to stay until the weekend and would I have a problem with James (name changed) staying a couple of extra nights. Of course I agreed as it appeared that he was having a great time and was behaving himself. I, therefore, had a couple of more days to fill as I pleased.

Had a call from James’ social worker today, Mum has gone on the missing list and cannot be contacted in anyway with her phone being unreachable. The rehab clinic is keen to talk to her but she is ignoring all efforts to contact her.

The social worker plans to visit the house to see if Mum is in or to find out where she is. I feel slightly concerned by this news but it’s up to others to find her.

So the golf clubs are out and it’s time to hit the golf course. Haven’t played for a while so it’s going to be hit and miss, literally, but the exercise is worth it and I can’t wait to get out there with a couple of long-time friends.

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The conversation turns to James and how is he doing. So I updated them about his football and how well he is doing. Obviously I don’t mention anything about his family life and the earlier news about Mum but I do tell them that he was very well settled, well behaved and a generally nice kid.

Like a lot of people, they seem to think that most children in care will be unruly and have come into care because of their behaviour, so I make them aware that it’s rarely the case that it’s the kid’s fault and it’s more likely the problems that the parents have.

They both seemed surprised by this and one of them said that he, and his wife, had thought about fostering but had been put off by the thought that their house would be wrecked by the kids they cared for. I am pretty sure that this is a problem that a lot of people have when they think about fostering.

Of course some placements can be unruly but only because they have been allowed to. One you, as a carer, put boundaries in place, it’s amazing how quickly behaviours can be changed and the young person adapts.

So the golf finished and I actually didn’t play that badly, and, most importantly, I only lost one golf ball. We sat outside, with a beer, and Dave asked, again, about fostering.

I said that if he was interested I could organise someone to pop around for a chat and to give him more information. He said he would have a chat with his other half and get back to me.

I got home and sorted out my gear and had a shower. Later that evening Dave called and said that it would be good if I could pop round for a chat with him and his wife prior to anybody else visiting. I agreed and we set a time and date.

Hopefully someone else who can be recruited to the cause.

Fosterman Blog – A Foster Carer Telling It Like It Is.

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Fostering Blog | Foster Carers Time

Foster Care Blog.

So I’m alone! James (name changed) has left me for a few days to go off with Paige and her family for a few days leaving me with an empty house and no idea what I was going to do with my free time.

I went to a friend’s house to watch the Champions League final and enjoyed a few beers. On Sunday I went to my local café for a nice cooked breakfast and read the papers while enjoying a coffee. I popped around to see my son and his wife and sat in the garden for the afternoon.

James rang me to see if I was ok! I asked if he was having a great time and he was. The weather was nice and there was a swimming pool there. I told him to make sure that he put sun cream on so he didn’t get burnt.

He seemed to be having a lovely time and I reminded him to say his please and thank yous. They had been having barbeques and he met some of Paige’s family and seemed very happy with things. They were going to the beach the following day and I have to admit I was quite jealous.

I did some house work, changed all the bedding, cleaned the fish tank, mowed the lawn and did some small jobs that needed doing. It was nice only having to worry about myself and not having to entertain James, but it was very quiet.

So with all the jobs done I sat and thought what next? I decided to load the car and go and have an afternoon’s fishing at our local lakes. It was beautiful, warm and sunny but with a nice cooling breeze. I sat there for about 4 hours with my peace only disturbed by catching a couple of Tench which were quickly returned.

I packed up, eventually, and went home. All my gear went back in the garage and I went and showered.

On the Monday Bank Holiday I sat and relaxed, went for a walk and then decided to go for a drive. I ended up in Rochester and had a walk around the town and the Castle.

Fostering Blog.

I found a nice pub with a carvery and sat and ate my body weight in Lamb. It was lovely to sit outside, eat, enjoy a cold shandy and watch the world go by. I then had a slow drive back and got home late afternoon. I eventually found a film to watch and settled down for a couple of hours.

When the film finished I checked emails and filled in a couple of forms that I needed to complete for my car insurance.

Obviously car insurance is very important given that I run kids around in my car so I have to make sure that everything is properly covered.

After doing all of that I updated my diary, checked everything was locked up, had a bath and went to bed. I slept like a log, not waking up until nine and had an initial panic until I remembered that James wasn’t here and there was no school anyway!

Fosterman Blog – Telling fostering as it is.

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Fostering Blog | Favourable Weather

Fostering Blog – Weather.

So normality has returned to the household. James (name changed) is back to his happy normal self and I spend the days pottering and trying to get motivated to do some more exercise.

I had a two hour online fostering training session to do which was fun and informative. I was also asked to have a chat with a single man who was keen to come into fostering. He seemed a nice guy with his own children. He was divorced and had been made redundant from work during the early days of COVID but didn’t want to return to an office type of job.

We had a really long chat and he seemed convinced that fostering was something that he wanted to do. I suggested that he kept in touch and that he could call at any time. James had no game or training this week and it looked like that could be then end of his season.

His team offered training during the summer and James had made it clear that he wanted to attend. The venue was a ten minute walk away so I told him that he could go whenever he wanted.

We had Paige round for dinner one evening. I said that it was a choice between my cooking and a Pizza and, surprisingly enough, they decided on the Pizza.

I got the food ordered and we sat and watched a film. It was a nice evening and I noticed how they looked really good as a couple. They were very comfortable around each other. I dropped Paige home at about 10.

James told me that Paige’s parents had a park home on the Kent coast and had asked if he wanted to join them. He said that Paige’s dad was going to call to ask if that was ok. I sent a quick email to his Social Worker to get the ok and I received, the following morning, an email in return saying that it was fine.

That evening Paige’s dad called and asked if it was ok for James to join them. I said it was fine and he updated me on the arrangements. They would be leaving on Saturday and would return on the following Thursday or Friday.

Fostering Blog.

When James got home from school we chatted about it and I told him the gist of the conversation with Paige’s dad.

We checked the weather forecast and it looked like the week’s weather was favourable. We started to get some clothes packed in his bag even though it was a couple of days before he left.

Given the weather forecast we went for shorts and tee shirts with a couple of sweatshirts and a pair of jeans. We packed some pyjamas, which he didn’t really wear at home, and loads of underwear.

With James being away for most of half term it left me wondering what I was going to do. I had some work to do around the house but I also thought that I would catch up with friends and family.

It would be nice to have a bit of a break but it would be strange having the house to myself. I was secretly looking forward to it but wouldn’t tell James that.

Fosterman Blog – A Foster Carer Telling It Like It Is.