My sons and their partners came around to meet James (name changed) as I’ve always felt that a Looked After Child (LAC) should feel part of your family if they are going to be staying for a fair while.
He got on really well with them and when I went out to make tea I returned to see a FIFA challenge starting on the PlayStation!
My sons have always accepted what I do and are now my back up carers. When I started Fostering they were still in Junior school but they thought it was exciting to go to Dad’s and meet the new kids who were staying.
In my childhood I had Auntie Linda (didn’t we all) who was a Foster Carer in Portsmouth and I can remember that same experience of being excited to see who was living there. The chance of meeting new kids, from what we thought at the time, was an exotic background, made visiting Auntie Linda a real treat.
My eldest son has gone to teaching now and he often says how one of his students reminds him of a child we had in care in the past. Having a son who is a teacher has also come in handy in the past when the thorny subject of homework comes up.
Now I’d consider myself to be reasonably intelligent but some of the homework tasks I’ve seen in the past have gone straight over my head.
So having a son at the end of the phone to help with this is a massive bonus. My other son is in IT which also has its benefits when computers or software has decided to play up.
So I’m sat with my son’s partners while the two of them and James play FIFA. I’ve noticed his phone pinging on a regular basis but took it to be his mates’ texting him.
So the next day, after James has left for school, I get a phone call from James’ Social Worker to say that Mum has made a complaint against me saying that I am actively discouraging James from talking to her and that James has rung her to say that he is unhappy and not being treated very well.
The Social Worker says that although she is happy that the complaints are untrue she has to follow procedure and visit James to discuss it with him.
We set a day for her visit and she says that it is her intention to take him off for food somewhere, which seems a sensible idea.
When James got home that evening I didn’t mention the complaint but asked who had been texting him when my sons were with us. He replied that it was Mum and that she was getting a bit of a pain, always trying to talk to him.
I left things after that and didn’t mention it again. James did his homework and we watched TV. I was pleased that James asked when my sons were coming around again as he had enjoyed their company.
James went off to bed at 10 and I updated my diary, checked messages and then went to bed.
A Blogging Foster Carer’s Diary.