Emma’s fostering blog
Vulnerable.
As foster carers we often care for children who are globally delayed, when Sam came she was 7 and unable to do so many things for herself.
Sam has had to be shown how to dress herself, put on shoes, eat with cutlery, had limited basic language much of a toddler, could not read, write or do basic number skills, was unable to say whether she wanted a drink, and could not follow simple instructions, had no routine, kept wandering off, had no social skills and no friends. She is a very vulnerable child who is trusting of everyone and would go with anyone, she is socially isolated and open to all forms of abuse and bullying.
When I went into Sam’s room one morning she was sitting on the window ledge in just her underwear, we had to remind her all the time to shut her door when getting changed and there were times when she would come down not appropriately dressed.
Then the arguments during the summer at bedtime because it’s still light outside, but it 8pm, she just doesn’t understand she thinks bedtime is when it’s dark outside.
However now 14 months on and she is very settled, having the right care and patience with her she has now learnt so much, and she is very capable of doing plenty for herself. She now responds well to boundaries and rewards.
She responds well to her behaviour chart which she loves getting stickers. Sam understands the reasons she may need time out when she needs it and has quickly learned there are consequences to her actions, she does not like consequences; not having internet or her DS.
Although Sam presents as a happy but needy child, we do have to make allowances as she does have a high level of emotional needs.
Today I bumped into someone I knew, Sam had never met this person before, she was really friendly and wanted to talk to them, and this often happens when we are out; talking to complete strangers and this makes her very vulnerable.
We are constantly trying to ensure her safety we are working on this with her. Just hearing Sam come home from School on a Friday, she rushed upstairs to get changed, while shouting down the stairs that she needs dinner early tonight so she’s not late for her club, and still no concept of time- funny really she gets in at 3.15pm and youth club is not until 7pm.
The fact that this is the first club she has managed and been attending for some time is great. Sam now can manage a variety of different opportunities and is seeing with peers after school, and has now made a couple of friends.
My thoughts are watching Sam make progress even in small steps, remembering that everything she does is a big achievement, is totally amazing.
Emma – A Foster Blogging Carer – I Love What I Do!
