Fostering Blogs

Hooray

Emma’s Fostering Blog

Hooray!

It’s a difficult time at the moment as Dan has reluctantly moved bedroom, newly decorated in a teenage theme. Dan got a telescope as a present from his family.

We had set boundaries around this because a few times he was seen at the window with it stating he was looking at the stars, however it was day time, a girl lives opposite; her bedroom is also at the front. I wasn’t aware that he was also looking out of his window every time a person walked by and making out that he was sad. I found out when neighbour mentioned this to me, they asked if he was ok as he looked so unhappy!

Dan is having good and bad days at School, and he is struggling since moving up a year and having a new Teacher. He had a bad time at school towards the end of last term with behavioural issues but has managed to turn it around and is on contract now at school, this means he gets full points each week and he can use the points to buy things, he has done well, gone back with a good attitude and it’s not easy to get on contract.

However, I was asked to come into School. The Teacher explained she is starting reading with the class after lunch, and they will not be using computers during this time until the class is settled and working well. He is struggling accepting this as previously in his last class he was allowed on the computer during this time.

The Teacher explained to him that it could be something for him to aim for but if given she will be expecting him to be doing literacy work and not games. Dan was particularly aggressive today because of this decision, he is a stickler for routine, he is also very black or white in his thoughts and this also shows in his behaviour. 

Dan didn’t think this was fair – shouting, swearing and generally being unpleasant. Dan finds it very hard to accept decisions made about his behaviour as he never wants to take responsibility for his mistakes. So today I updated his routine chart and this includes rewards for staying on contract, although he is 12 he functions much younger and still needs visual aids.

I spoke to Dan I wanted to tell him all the positives, about all times he has done really well at School and we discussed setting up some rewards with him if he manages his targets and gets back on contract, it was nice seeing the smile on his face.

A couple of weeks later I read “Just to let you know that Dan made Golden time this week and is now on contract”. Hooray!

My thoughts are it’s a shame this behaviour happening again, but it is still possible to achieve but he needs to want to turn things around.

Emma – A Blogging Foster Carer – I Love What I Do!